#89 – TURKEY HERO AND ARNOLD PALMER at DOUGL...

July 29th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

I’ve spent the last nine months searching for authentic New York food. In case you’re just joining me now, I’ve done pizza, corned beef/pastrami, and now ice cream. So what about that other quintessential NY dish – the cheap turkey and swiss sandwiches from the corner deli?

When I first moved to the city this is all I ate for a cheap, quick lunch. And they were from bodegas named Sunshine Deli or Corner Deli. Places that we go for a late night beer run or our morning newspaper. The turkey was almost always Boar’s Head. Served on a generic roll with swiss cheese, mustard, lettuce, and tomatoes. And back in 2001 (when I first moved here), you got it all for about 4 or 5 bucks.

Could Time Out really have included one of these on their list? And could it really be out in almost Long Island?

The Douglaston Deli is in Douglaston, Queens. It’s technically within the five boroughs but it’s close to the border of Nassau County and has the feel of upscale suburbia. Inside the deli is laid out a bit differently than the ones in Manhattan (a bit more narrow, believe it or not), but the products are pretty much the same. Even the Boar’s Head line-up.

Except, supposedly, the turkey breast here is an exception. It’s advertised as roasted in house so it should be moister and fresher. I ordered the hero minus any cheese so I could get the true flavor of their turkey. Lettuce, tomato, and just a shmear of mustard and I should be good to go.

But wait a minute, TONY also includes in this list item a drink pairing. Not a Riesling or a Prosecco, but a more appropriate choice for turkey: an Arnold Palmer. For those unfamiliar with the lunch drink, it’s half lemonade/half Iced Tea and all golf pro. It’s never been my favorite since I’m not a huge fan of lemonade, but I thought this could be the AP that changed my mind.

This deli’s version is also homemade so they use fresh squeezed lemons. If they were going to go for it, they should probably brew their own iced tea as well, but this tasted much like it came from a package. And I found the lemonade a bit too tart and the tea a bit cloyingly sweet. Making it in store should allow them to fine tune the combinations and adjust.

The sandwich was also nothing special. The meat may have been a little more moist, but I don’t think I could pick it out against Boar’s Head in a blind tasting. I missed the cheese which would have added some flavor to the sandwich. The meat also seemed to get lost in the bread which happens alot with these types of heros. The turkey was fine, but certainly not worth the trip and not much better than any corner deli’s version. Trust me, I speak from experience.

Would Douglaston Delicatessen’s Turkey Hero and Arnold Palmer make my Top 100 of the year? The sandwich is pretty average and seems like something you could get on any street in Manhattan and the Arnold Palmer may just not be my cup of tea (and lemonade). Together they get a 5 out of 10.

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HAPPY HANDOUTS (Screme Gelato Bar)

July 28th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received 4 Comments »

There’s been a lot of controversy lately in the food blog and media world revolving around free food. There’s no mystery here: it’s one of my favorite things. But stemming from an article in the Times about food writer Josh Ozersky’s wedding that was catered by some big time NY chefs at no charge, many people are questioning the legitimacy of free food. Especially when it goes to starving, but critical food bloggers like myself.

I couldn’t help thinking about this when the girls at Screme Gelato Bar, upon seeing my camera and discovering I’m writing about the best ice cream in the city, offered me free samples of every single flavor in the shop. Now, it’s a bit different here because I was going to be buying something and from what I understand, these Screme girls are always enthusiastic and generous with the samples.

And while I sensed I was being buttered up to write a good review, I do genuinely feel these young employees love their job and fully believe in their product. Where the owners of Screme got such dedicated and loyal employees, I have no idea. When I visited Best Buy down the street, I received the complete opposite experience.

The good news is, I don’t have to agonize over whether I should give them a good review just because I got free samples. The gelato is actually really good. Even after spending close to five bucks for the small portion, I still can recommend their ice cream! It’s worth the expensive price tag.

The samples came at me fast and furiously. I started with Chocolate Brownie Whiskey, which was the most unique flavor they offered. It was silky and smooth, but I didn’t get a strong liquor flavor. I moved on to Butter Cookie (rich buttery goodness – I could taste the dough), Caramel Brownie (a bit sweet for me), the Blood Orange Sorbet (tart and refreshing), and on and on from there.

I finally settled on the Nutella Chip (which the girl was amazed was the only one I didn’t sample). This is a classic gelato flavor and Screme got it just right. It wasn’t too sweet, but it was creamy and thick and rich. There was a lot going on, but there wasn’t too much milkfat that it would coat my mouth. This is an important quality of gelato.

I also like the chocolate slivers that were mixed throughout. They were very thin bits that reminded me of a hard chocolate dip. The only thing this dish could have used was something crunchy and it would have been absolutely perfect.

The girls told me that all of Screme’s gelato is made daily at their other store (inside Madame Tussaud’s in Times Square) so the flavors change all the time. And while I’m excited by a more convenient location and the chance to view their churning process, it’s in Times Square, so I don’t know if I’ll ever actually brave the tourists to check it out.

The Upper West Side location has its own issues: it’s tiny (literally just a storefront) and the prices are steep ($5 for just a single!). But the ice cream is great, the staff is genuinely sweet, and you might just get a handful of free samples. Even if you’re not writing a blog on the best ice cream in the city.

Is Screme’s ice cream the best in NY? 8 out of 10 because the energetic service, interesting flavors, and perfectly textured gelato make me want to scream – but out of ecstasy not pain.

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#88 – THE HUMMER DOG at PDT

July 27th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

I sort of think the foodie movement has gone a little too far when chefs have hot dogs inspired by and named after them. What’s next – a Tom Colicchio action figure?

PDT, the secret bar behind scuzzy East Village hot dog staple Crif Dogs, offers exclusive hot dogs (all cooked at Crif Dogs but served only at the speakeasy) to pair with their fancy mixologist approved cocktails. This place is worth a visit to anybody remotely interested in the bar or restaurant scene in New York. It feels highly exclusive. Although the initials stand for Please Don’t Tell, everybody does just the opposite. You have to make reservations the day of after 3pm or hope that a first-come first-served bar stool is available. Then when you arrive, you have to enter the phone booth inside Crif Dogs and wait for the hostess to open the fake door and acknowledge your presence.

We didn’t have too much trouble sitting at the bar on a Monday night. And no problem ordering the list item hot dog. The only problem I had was with all the rules. The one mentioning no flash photography is completely understandable, but now, dear reader, you too will have to be understandable when you see that my candle-lit (and computer enhanced) picture didn’t come out so great.

The Hummer Dog is the only option here that does not seem to be named after a chef or NY restaurant. The Wylie dog (named for molecular gastronomer Wylie Dufresne) features fried mayonnaise and the Chang Dog (inspired by pork obsessed Asian chef David Chang) is wrapped in bacon and topped with kimchi. With all that fat, who would guess that further down on the list would be a veggie dog with hummus, pickles, and jalapeños?

That’s just what the Hummer is. The link itself must have been made from soy, but it had a smoky flavor and an impressive snap. My big problem here was because of all the stuff they loaded on the dog I could no longer taste the protein. I found that true of all of their hot dogs. I wish the special toppings complemented the dog rather than distracted from it. It left me asking, where’s the non-beef?

Would PDT’s Hummer Dog make my Top 100? A 6 out of 10 because it’s a great option as far as veggie dogs, but there’s just too much of the hummus and pickles to really taste the dog itself.

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POLITICAL (ICE CREAM) PARTIES (Guerrilla Ice Cream...

July 26th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

Everybody’s gotta have a gimmick, right? It’s certainly true when it comes to ice cream. Sure, you could make simple flavors and hark back to the old ice cream shops of the 5o’s. But isn’t it fun when you flamboyantly dress up your Mr. Softee truck (Big Gay Ice Cream) or make liquid nitrogen ice cream (Lulu & Mooky’s) or vegan ice cream (Stogo)? But who could have seen Guerilla Ice Cream’s gimmick coming?

This brand new mobile ice cream vendor is selling ice cream sundaes named after and inspired by political revolutions. Say what? It doesn’t seem to make much sense to me, but just go with the strange names like Red Corridor and Velvet Revolution. I don’t know enough (okay, I don’t know anything) about these revolutionary movements to make the connection with the names. So to me it seems rather arbitrary and gimmicky. But they do make some crazy, intriguing flavors and toppings. And Che Guevara be damned, if it tastes good, who cares what it all means?

They’re set up on Saturdays at the Hester Street Fair and at the Fulton Stall Market on Sundays. I caught them a few weeks back at the Hester Street Fair, which is a foodie nerd’s wet dream. You could eat an avocado paleta, a cheddar truffle pretzel, and a kimchi dog all in a matter of a few minutes. These are unique vendors selling their food because they’re passionate about it. And most of these guys don’t have a home. They’re a new kind of street vendor, who instead of moving from street to street, move from internet sites to food festivals.

Guerilla Ice Cream is one of three vendors selling frozen treats (La Newyorkina does paletas and Melt Bakery does ice cream sandwiches) at the Fair. And they’re the ones making the most unique flavor combinations. The watermelon and avocado paletas are great, but nothing touches Steel Buddha Tea Sorbet topped with Chinese walnut cookies and dragonfruit.

That was their special the day I showed up. It was called Chinatown Tea Party and it was amazing. The sorbet had some rich, earthy tea flavors that was refreshing and the texture of the sweet crunchy cookie pieces with the mild sweetness of the dragonfruit was just incredible.

And that was just one of six flavor combinations on offer. They were more than eager to let us try as many as we want – they have to be if they’re going to sell such obscure flavors as chai masala. Everything we tasted was intensely flavored and the toppings all sounded great. The most pedestrain flavor they served was the dark chocolate and port wine, which had a very dense, rich texture and a slightly bitter but lively chocolate bite.

They can call this stuff whatever they want, but as long as they put inspired and innovative flavors and ingredients together, I’ll come find them at Hester Street Fair or wherever they may be.

Is Guerrilla Ice Cream the best ice cream in NY? They get a 7 out of 10 because it’s certainly unique and while it may not appeal to all palates, it’s a fun concept and their flavor combinations work well.

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#87 – GREEK YOGURT at NINTH AVENUE INTERNATI...

July 23rd, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

Now here’s a great example of how New York is so diverse. We were seeking out another list item and were brought to Ninth Avenue International Foods. It’s a Greek-owned food store. The cashier is of Hispanic descent, they sell everything from Israeli cous cous to Italian meats, and everybody was gathered around a TV watching Uruguay and Spain fight it out on the World Cup. And here I am, a white American with Russian ancestors adding (although not nearly as exotically) to the beautiful melting pot.

Ninth Avenue International Foods sells all sorts of groceries but when it comes to prepared food (all stored in a little refrigerator by the register), it’s mainly Greek or Mediterranean here. Hummus, tzatziki, spinach pie, and Greek yogurt.

And it’s that Greek yogurt that TONY wrote about and the stuff I came for. We ordered almost a pound (it was only $6 a pound) to go and I decided to enjoy it at breakfast with some fresh berries.

I don’t know what I’m going to do with a pound of this stuff. It’s incredibly rich and thick. The yogurt has a very subtle sweetness and a strong tangy tartness.  When mixed with berries, it was a bit reminiscent of sour cream and the sweetness of the berries brought the white stuff to life.

I think some granola would also be nice for texture and I may try that later in the week. This sheep’s milk, live-cultured yogurt will last me a little while. It’s so rich and thick that I can only eat a little at a time. Maybe if I invited over all my European friends to help out. And my Middle Eastern friends. And my Asian friends. You get the point.

Would Ninth Avenue International Foods’ Greek Yogurt make my Top 100 of the year? It’s a bit too thick for my tastes but I can see how this can be a great jumping off point for a hearty breakfast or a rich topping. Nonetheless, it only gets a 6 out of 10 in my book.

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FIVE MONTHS OUT OF EVERY YEAR (La Maison du Chocol...

July 21st, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received 2 Comments »

I’ll never forget on one of my first visits to New York touring NBC Studios and then walking through a strange underground mall. I remember high-end shops, fast moving foot traffic, and food courts. It was an exciting hybrid of New York urban life and my shopping mall rich South Florida adolescent.

When I first moved to New York, that subterranean consumer world remained a mysterious memory. Until one day, I discovered it. It’s called Rockefeller Center. And instead of reliving my childhood excitement, now I try to stay as far away as possible.

But my ice cream journey brings me back. I descended one of the cavernous stairwells and even had to consult the wall map to determine just where I could find La Maison du Chocolat. I had heard talk of this wondrous place before. It’s a chocolatier from Paris and supposedly makes some of the best chocolate in this city.

Once I was inside, I discovered I didn’t have to enter the underground Rockefeller Center at all. There is also an entrance on 49th Street and I realized I had walked by this shop (quite obliviously) numerous times before. I don’t usually window shop or even turn my head toward all the touristy boutique shops in this area. I feel like just browsing would cost me an arm and a leg.

La Maison Du Chocolat is very ritzy with golden walls and fancy display cases. I did feel a little out of place since I don’t have a Black American Express card, but the staff immediately welcomed me and I was quickly offered a free sample of their chocolate. Not one to say no to free chocolate, I enjoyed it, but kept my eye on the ice cream case in the front.

The lady was more than happy to let me sample, but she warned me the flavors were going to be more intense since they don’t use any preservatives and the ice cream is all made fresh in their Upper West Side location (it’s their only product not made and shipped from France). I went for the caramel, which was delicious. It took a second for the flavor to explode on my tongue, but when it did, it tasted like real burnt sugar. It was not to sweet and I have not had caramel ice cream this good since I first tried Otto’s gelato many years ago. I also tried the chocolate (how could I not?) ice cream and it was intense. They use a blend of dark chocolates and the complexity was overwhelming. So good!

I settled on a waffle cone of coffee, my perfect flavor. I was impressed that the waffle cone was the same price as a cup – $4. Now somehow with milk prices being what they are and gelaterias charging insane prices, this is actually a steal. Especially for this neighborhood. And especially for ice cream this good.

The coffee was made with real espresso and I felt like I was somewhere in Paris enjoying a cold, creamy macchiato. A nice thought for a moment or two because I was immediately rushed back into the hot, crowded streets of midtown. La Maison du Chocolat only serves their ice cream in the summer months (May – September). So for most of the year, I won’t have to come down into the hectic Rockefeller Center. But from now until September, I may have to move in.

Is La Maison du Chocolat the best ice cream in NY? Even though it’s a Paris recipe, the creamy stuff is made in Manhattan and it is so intensely flavored and satisfyingly creamy that it receives a 9 out of 10. If it was available all year round, it just might get that extra point.

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#86 – HOUSE HOT DOG at BARK HOT DOGS

July 20th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

People love to tell me what I should tackle on my next food journey. There are so many options in New York. But the one that seems to get recommended the most often are hot dogs. It’s clearly a New York dish and I suppose I’ll have to get to them eventually. But I’ll admit, I’m not looking forward to it.

I like hot dogs, sure, but childhood memories of badly boiled wieners and the knowledge of all that goes into making a frank, has me putting off the hot dog challenge for as long as possible. I do like them once in a while (and it usually has to do with an event or holiday or something), but they’re not a food that I want to eat on a regular basis.

Now, proper sausages on the other hand, I could eat all the time (Thank God I don’t). And when the lines between a hot dog and a sausage tend to blur, then I’ve got some eating to do.

Bark Hot Dogs in Park Slope is one of the many new spots in New York that is trying to blur that line and turn the hot dog from a dirty water floater to a gourmet dish.

Although unlike at Crif Dogs or Dogmatic, Bark doesn’t really try to re-invent the hot dog. They just use the finest ingredients (as related from their list of sources on the table) and add some tasty toppings to their Classic Dog. Time Out called for us to try the House Dog so we just got a plain dog (minus any chili or cheddar), added some mustard and bit in.

What a snap! Just as much as flavor, I think a hot dog should be judged on its snap. And this guy exploded on each bite. It’s an exciting sensation and a slightly laborious work-out for your teeth. In a good way.

And the flavor of this pork and beef blend was hearty and complex. It had a meaty, rich beginning and a surprisingly smoky finish. I’ve never deconstructed a hot dog like this. And I haven’t even gotten to the bun which was perfectly toasty giving way to a soft interior.

The veggie version that we got (made of mushrooms and chickpeas) didn’t fare quite as well. There was no snap (I’ve yet to have a veggie version that’s successfully re-created the snap sensation) and the flavors and textures were a little muddied and soft.

But stick to the meat here and you’ll be happy. And it’s definitely gotten me thinking about the best hot dogs in the city. You might see a hot dog episode sooner than you think.

Would Bark Hot Dog’s House Dog make my Top 100 of the year? The link gets an 8 out of 10, much higher than I anticipated, but this frankfurter is fresh, flavorful, and fantastic.

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#85 – EGG SANDWICH at BARK HOT DOGS

July 19th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

When I received the egg sandwich from Bark Hot Dogs, I couldn’t help but think of all those early morning fast food breakfasts I had on family road trips. This thing looks like it could have come from a McDonald’s microwave. Did Time Out really send me to taste this?

But knowing that this casual eatery in Park Slope focuses on local and farm fresh ingredients (if you didn’t know, just check out their resource list), I imagined that looks could and would be deceiving. I’d be surprised if there was actually a microwave in house.

Bark feels just like a local fast food joint. It had the bar stools, the walk-up counter, and the greasy food to make you feel at home (if home were Burger King). So it was no wonder that the sandwich brought back those memories of eating on the run. But, of course, this is gourmet Brooklyn so even the fastest food is still cooked to order (and no longer qualifies as being fast).

We ordered our egg sandwich with all fancy fix-in’s: the house sausage (a ginger-flavored meat patty) and sharp Grafton cheddar cheese. The cheese was sadly a bit sparse on the sandwich, but we got to experience its rich, creamy sharpness on our cheese fries.

And really it was all these extra things that made the sandwich anything other than what you would find at your local fast food establishment (and I mean one that doesn’t convert its kitchen grease into diesel fuel). The buttery, crunchy English muffin was a perfect complement to the egg, which looked as if it had been scrambled in a mold (the menu says it’s slow-cooked). It was flawlessly formed, but rather bland and underseasoned. The sausage was the most interesting item between the bread. It had a dark pink hue and was rich, meaty, spicy, and even a bit sweet. The ginger flavor was a pleasant surprise.

The ingredients were all fresh and well-prepared, but the sandwich itself was really only exciting for one reason: It proved that you can make those classic fast food dishes with good ingredients, unique flavors, and you probably couldn’t tell the difference. Except of course, you’d have to double the wait time.

Would Bark Hot Dogs’ Egg Sandwich make my Top 100 of the year? It wasn’t much different than an Egg McMuffin, except it had freshness and flavor behind it and so earns a 7 out of 10.

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BELOW THE BOARDWALK (Denny’s Delight)

July 17th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received No Comments »

I find myself on Coney Island so rarely (in fact, I’ve only been three times in the nine years I’ve lived in New York) that I feel I need to take full advantage of the journey and explore and taste as much as I can. No, I didn’t ride the Cyclone. I know this sounds like an excuse, but I had a stiff neck the evening we were there and based on all the painful stories I’ve heard about the old wooden roller coaster, I decided to sit that one out.

We did go to Totonno’s for some classic coal-oven pizza and we walked along the Boardwalk, boarded the Wonder Wheel, and watched some summertime fireworks. And since I was out here, I figured I should try to find some New York ice cream. The only place that had a rating on yelp and sounded mildly interesting was Denny’s Delight.

We left the newly designed (yet still with that old scuzzy Coney Island feeling) Luna Park for a moment to find the soft serve. It was crammed among hot dog shops and bumper cars. And it sold everything from funnel cakes to candy apples. As soon as I spotted it, I knew exactly what I was getting myself into. This is over-priced typical carnival style soft serve. But it’s exactly what I wanted to wash down the smell of popcorn and cotton candy.

The cone was $3 and a tiny portion at that. I chose a mix of vanilla and chocolate, even though they offered banana and pistachio. I just wasn’t feeling that exotic today (not that those are exotic flavors). This is Coney Island. It made me feel young and a bit naive. It harkened back to a time before I knew of corn ice cream or bacon bit toppings. When ice cream was chocolate and vanilla and strawberry if you were lucky.

The ice cream was successful at being soft and creamy. I was a bit disappointed they didn’t offer the swirl option. To me, there’s nothing better than eating the two flavors and trying to figure out how they’re perfectly swirled and seeing if you can eat one flavor without the other. Does anybody have any idea what the hell I’m talking about?

Regardless, this was just vanilla on top of chocolate. The chocolate was rich and sweet, while the vanilla tasted a bit generic. I imagine they were from a mix, but that’s what I expect from soft serve. It’s fun to eat and the flavors are familiar and the texture is what this stuff is all about. It really is a perfect cap to a night at Coney Island. It fits the prices of everything else and is just as strangely satisfying.

Is Denny’s Delight the best ice cream in NY? It’s fine for what it is, so a 6 out of 10 because I wouldn’t want anything more after a Nathan’s hot dog and a painful roller coaster ride.

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CHURN, CHURN, CHURN! (Blue Marble)

July 15th, 2010 by Brian Hoffman received 5 Comments »

I really really wanted to like Blue Marble. Really I did. It’s co-owned by Alexis Miesen and Jennifer Dundas, two friends who had a dream of making ice cream. Dundas is a working New York stage actress and we have mutual friends, so I had a particular interest in her story and her product.

The name is a reference to the earth itself and Blue Marble really concentrates on maintaining a green and eco-friendly business. The cups are recyclable, the electricity is renewable, even the walls are painted with a special paint alternative that uses natural clay. I felt bad walking into the store wearing a non-organic cotton T-shirt.

And I haven’t even mentioned the edibles yet. Of course, all the ice cream is organic. The cream comes from grass-fed cows, the ingredients are local, and the flavors are all natural. One thing that I don’t like is that all their ice cream is made on a farm in the Hudson Valley. This is something I will see time and time again on this ice cream journey. Very few of these spots make their ice cream in house. And a lot of the ice cream shop owners are businessmen first and ice cream churners not at all. And this is part of the problem with Blue Marble. They seem to concentrate more on doing good for the earth and the community and somewhere along the way, they forgot to make good ice cream.

Now I’m sure I’ll get killed for these opinions. Since they opened in 2007, they’ve gotten lots of press and praise and have become Brooklyn’s go-to neighborhood ice cream shop. The original location is on Atlantic Avenue in Boerum Hill, complete with a back patio and a children play area. The shop became such a success that two more locations sprouted up: a Prospect Heights store and a Cobble Hill kiosk. You can also find Blue Marble ice cream at Brooklyn Flea and on Governor’s Island. So you can imagine somebody’s enjoying this ice cream.

I guess I just don’t get it. I visited the Prospect Heights location a few years back.  I even wrote about it on my old ice cream blog.  But I’ll save you the frustration and me the embarrassment of having to read that poorly written review by summing my first impressions up right here. I was surprised to find the ice cream to be reminiscent of silly putty. The chewy texture wasn’t the only downfall – the flavors were rather flat and artificial. But that was all in the past, right?

I was eager to give Blue Marble a second chance and to erase that bitter taste I had in my mouth. It was late on a Saturday night and although they were getting ready to close, there was still a line out the door. Who are these people and do they really not have good taste in ice cream? Or are they just far less critical than I?

The first flavor I tasted was root beer. Who doesn’t love some sassafaras in the summer? And as a creamy ice cream, it’s reminiscent of an ice cream float. Except while the root beer flavors were strong, the texture was rather gummy. I also sampled the banana, which tasted strangely of medicine. And the strawberry (which had a fancy name which included the word tart) was devoid of any sort of sweetness.

The two flavors I settled on in my waffle cone were rum raisin and that old standby cookies and cream. I should have re-read my old blog review first to jog my memory. The rum raisin (one of my favorites, but rarely done well) was one of my disappointments the first time around and this one proved not much better. The raisins were barely noticeable (Two Scoops this is not!) and the rum flavor (when present) tasted of rum extract. I know alcohol is a hard flavor to incorporate into ice cream (due to the expense and the difficulty with freezing the alcohol), but when you’re going to tout all natural ingredients and fresh, local products, I’d expect more than a concentrated liquid flavor.

The cookies and cream was a bit bland but suffered more from texture problems. It was icy! I actually crunched on an ice crystal. The secret to creamy, smooth ice cream is to inhibit the growth of ice crystals. I think somebody needs to tell Blue Marble the secret. Because it seems they do everything right except (in my mind) the most important thing of all: sell good ice cream.

Is Blue Marble the best ice cream in NY? Unfortunately, not by a long shot. I hate to leave negative reviews to a company that does so much good for the community and the earth, but I just can’t get behind their mediocre product. 5 out of 10.

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